Kyle Rutkin

Digital Marketer. Brand Strategist. Freelance Writer.

On Being Selfish in Your 20s

UncategorizedKyle RutkinComment

One of the countless self-help articles about being in your twenties, claims it’s okay to be selfish in your twenties. I hear that all the time. This is the time to do it.

You need to be selfish.

Be selfish while you have no responsibilities.


I get it. And that’s right to an extent, except the being selfish part of it. Selfish is not the right word. Being selfish in your twenties is only teaching you how to be selfish in your thirties and forties. Being selfish means you put your own needs above others. You strengthen your ego and weaken your true self.

Should we do what we want in our twenties, yes! But that has nothing to do with being selfish. Chasing things that make us happy is NOT selfish at all.  Every time you get pumped up and inspired about something, you're directly serving the world. By doing what you love, and pursuing life with passion, you are putting the needs of others on the same playing field as your own. Go travel. Chase your dreams. Be awesome. Shine light. Pursue things you love. Be interested in life. None of that is selfish.

I get that people think they need to be selfish to chase their dreams or take a plane to Thailand for eight months. But honestly, that’s the opposite of selfish. Growing as a person and doing what makes your heart tick, only serves the world. And that makes you selfless.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” ? Marianne WilliamsonA Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of "A Course in Miracles"