Kyle Rutkin

Digital Marketer. Brand Strategist. Freelance Writer.

Ode To The First Hater

UncategorizedKyle Rutkin3 Comments

When most of us start a project, there are very few haters. Our mothers usually beem with pride (there's my son, the entreprenuer) and our friends are overly supportive (oh yeah, 40 likes on my status). If you show them your art or idea, they will probably nod in excitement, "oh that sounds cool," "what an amazing idea," "this book is GREAAAT."

It feels pretty good knowing that you are awesome and your idea is awesome and you can't fail and you are the coolest person in the world and you are about to be rich and famous, right?

Then comes the first hater. It was bound to happen. If you're doing anything worthwhile, somebody will be threatened. They will be upset that their job sucks or that they didn't come up with the idea, or that they think their idea is better, or their cubicle blows. Or they might have just broken up with their girlfriend-- and your piece of work/idea/whatever-- was the first thing they came across. And then they slam you. I mean, hard. Their comment or email is so harsh that your stomach sinks and your head spins.

All of a sudden, everything prior to this moment is discounted. I suck, everyone lied, what am I doing, this is stupid, I shouldn't have taken a risk, I should go back to what I know, BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH.

Here's the deal. Stepping outside the box is hard. It opens you up to criticism. People don't notice when you're in line with everyone else. But they do notice the person that does something different. They see him as a threat; a rebel-- someone that challenges their own decisions or their lack of action. Because if you can do it, so could they. So they will try to discredit you. They will say that your idea is lame and your art is whack.

You can try to fight it, but you will lose. The only thing you can do is push harder. EVERYONE who has ever risen of of obscurity has had haters. Anyone who has done anything worthwhile, has dealt with failure. You can internalize it and get pissed, but at the end of the day, you need them. If you didn't have them, you would be stuck with friends and family nodding their head in approvel. You want people to say you suck, because it's a direct sign that your circle of influence is expanding outside of your facebook newsfeed. It means that if you keep pushing, that same hater will have to continue to hear your name for years to come. And out of the ashes of hating comes respect. It means your doing something right. Dear First Hater. Thank You. Sincerely, Risk Taker.